The other night I decided to treat myself to dinner at one of my favorite restaurants. I ordered my favorite dishes, honeyed prawns with walnuts and sautéed asparagus with garlic. I drank my favorite white wine Testarossa Chardonnay. I had a delicious time and truly had that "Life is good" feeling! So after I paid for my meal, I sat for a short while savoring the moment and I thought you know it's important for us to acknowledge people when they have done a great job. I decided I would give my thanks to the manager for the pleasant repast I had just experienced.
I walked up to the hostess and asked her if I could speak to the manager. She told me that unfortunately he was busy at that moment but was there something she could assist me with. I said, "Yes, would you please give him a message for me? Would you tell him that I love coming here. The food is always well prepared, fresh and reasonably priced. The service is great and the ambiance of the restaurant is delightful." With a distraught look on her face she immediately said, "Oh, I am so sorry!"
I put my hand on her arm to ground her and looked intently into her eyes and said in an even cadence, "No. I said I am extremely happy with your restaurant because the food, the service and the ambiance is consistently excellent. And I believe it is important to let people know when they have done a good job. Would you please let him know that?" She instantly relaxed, her demeanor shifted and she began to giggle with embarrassment. She said, "Yes, yes. Oh thank you!"
Here is a classic example of someone having an expectation that was so great that they did not hear a word of what was actually said but instead heard what they expected. How did this happen? I am sure that on many occasions customers had asked her if they could speak to the manager and she had had a conversation with them or had heard them speak to the manager and it was not pretty. As a result stored in her subconscious mind was a belief that if someone asks for the manager it is going to be an unpleasant situation because that has been emotionally imprinted by her experiences.
Every experience you have ever had is stored away in your subconscious mind. This library of experiences with associated emotional intensity creates beliefs. The subconscious beliefs that are formed are a means of keeping you prepared and safe for future experiences of the same ilk. If you are in a situation where you have a repetitive cycle of similar experiences with intense emotional trauma then you will have great difficulty being present when it appears that the same or a similar situation is presenting itself. Why is this?
It is because the subconscious mind takes over and immediately prepares the body by triggering the fight or flight mechanism.
In the fight or flight state the heart pounds, blood pressure rises, breathing becomes shallow, adrenaline production increases, palms become cold and sweaty, and blood flow to the extremities is decreased. The body is prepared to run like the wind or stand its ground and fight for dear life. It is not a state conducive to openness, clarity of hearing and being in the moment. Consequently we are unable to respond in the appropriate manner to the actual situation that is unfolding in present time.
How can we change this? We can change the way we respond to life's challenges by paying attention to our response patterns. If we identify a pattern that is clearly out of line with reality then it is time to clear the emotional memory imprint that is keeping the belief anchored in the subconscious. Once the emotional memory is cleared the belief collapses and dissolves which enables us to deal directly from our highest level of awareness in formerly stressful situations.
Call me today to set up an appointment - I'll help you take the next step to achieving your radiant vitality!
Assisting mankind in taking responsibility for their health and well-being.
~Heather
